Monday, September 24, 2012

Do me a quick favor, por favor...

Okay.

Everyone put on their calm, cool, collected hats.  I need a rational voice.

Bubba the magnificent stayed home from work today (he has a business trip later this week, and frankly, we're right smack in the middle of watching "The Walking Dead" series which is really, really good.. and he's a workaholic so this is a rare treat).

I am going to crank this out in five minutes while he has briefly stepped out, because I don't feel the need to share this level of insanity with him, because it's temporary and shall pass.

Let's get the facts straight, for a second.

Jenny does not ovulate.  This is my first full real cycle since the dreaded chemical, and the likelihood of me still getting a bonus ovulation from the month-o-hormones back in June is hi-lariously slim.

I think I'm getting sick.  This is probably from the endless allergies I have.

I had two episodes in the last couple of days of brief, bright red spotting.  But really, I can't tell maybe it's coming from my popo.

And my left ovary - just my left - has been giving me some sass the last few days.

Just know, I am normally very rational and fully understand I'm not going to get knocked up without half a dozen men in labcoats in the room.  I bought a test this morning to shut myself up, really.

That stupid bitch Hope.  I have long since abandoned fucking around with her every month in hopes that she would turn it into a relationship.

But, unfortunately, I appear to be having a day where I am getting a sinus infection, probably some sort of traitorous cyst on my ovary, and mayhaps bleeding from my popo (what.. could that.. be...)

So just do me a favor, look at this, tell me it's negative, and then I will carry on back to my tap dancing , Forest Gumping my way through infertility, and waiting ever-so-patiently to do IVF later this year or in January.


::hangs head in shame::

20 comments:

  1. Girl. I swear I see a faint line. It could be the photo but I'm hoping for you. ;)

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  2. It looks negative to me; I don't see a second line at all. But I will confess that the lighting is less than ideal, so it's possible you are seeing something in person that isn't showing up in this photo.

    I'm sorry you're sick. Hope you feel better soon.

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  3. Honestly, my dearest chickadee, and as much as seeing two pinkies on this page would make me just about as happy as I know how to be, I see nada. I have tilted my screen every which way, but then I am not good at spotting fainties. If it helps any my nipples are playing me up this month trying to get me to give hope a second chance, but that screwy bitch is going to have to work harder than that to worm her flightly way back into my affections. Sore nipples, I laugh in your face. Having said all that, I hope sincerely that in the next few days you manage to prove me and my squinty eyes wrong.

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  4. Negative, girlfriend. Blah. Ah the things infertility will do to us :) Enjoy your day with your hubby!!

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  5. Thank you ladies for the eyes! I'm 99.999999% positive that it's negative, of course, but there is a stupid evap line or something. ::sigh:: Not to mention the perfect storm of unrelated symptoms.

    I would like to drop kick hope in the face.

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  6. I don't see the line either...Hope is an awful Bitch. She and I had an all-out fight yesterday. I did not win.

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  7. I don't see it either, but I was hoping maybe I was the only one. :( I hope you enjoy your day, anyway!

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  8. Can I have a crack at hope when you're done with her? I've about had it with her shit this week! Enjoy the day with Bubba and get back to chatting with us soon...I'm definitely in need of a good laugh! And this just makes me want to cry...

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  9. I'm sorry, sweetie, but that looks exactly like every g--damn pregnancy test I've taken. (Except the one I took after a trigger shot, just so I'd have the thrill of seeing a second line.) Stupid, stupid, stupid Hope. :(

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  10. I feel like I am now conditioned to see lines on those freaking tests. I am weird and always stalk the Waiting to Test board on Fertility Friend because for some sick reason I love seeing 2 pink lines. It doesn't matter if they are mine or not. I blew the pic up and tweaked it, but don't see more than a shadow/indent right now. I wonder how many dpo you are? Gosh I just want there to be 2 freaking lines for you so bad!!

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  11. wishing and hoping and thinking and sort of praying (or meditating really) that there's some reason for you guys to have that bitch of hope hanging around...

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  12. I hate to say that I see only one line...but if you are thinking there may be a chance...then I would pee again tomorrow morning and see.

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  13. Sorry precious (I had someone call me "precious" the other day and almost barfed so I had to do it to someone else!) I don't see anything but one damn line. Hey, test again in a day or two though, otherwise you are going to drive yourself CRAZY! Here's hoping we are all wrong and there is another line!

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  14. I can't ever tell if there's a faint line in pictures on the internet. But as always, I'm hoping it means something will show up in a few days.

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  15. Well ..... maybe if you cross your eyes? (And drink a bottle of vodka?) But I wish and hope for you that the mystical second line does show its sorry face for you one day very soon!

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  16. Sorry but I don't see it. Wishing it would be so.

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  17. So sorry but I dont see anything...wishing you tons of luck in your upcoming IVF cycle

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  18. Booo :-( I just can't tell from the picture - but now I realize what your hope post was about. I am always always praying for you - IVF or not!

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