About Stork


1.  My name is Jenny.  That is me.  On the left.

2.  That dog is not mine.  That dog is my best homies homey P-Doo.  For the homies actually in my home click here, they won't sit still for pictures with me because they're asshats.  (For the record... not even convinced that dog is a dog.  Pretty sure it's a mechanical toy).

3.  I am 31.  (SHIT BALLS I am editing this and I am now 33 how the eff did that happen). My neighboring years are officially grown ups.  They do taxes instead of jello shots.  Hold me to your breast for comfort like I was a frightened yorkshire terrier.

4. I am an aspiring sometimes actual writer.  Me like words good.

5.  I am from California, Washington D.C., Mexico.  I love muppets, Quentin Tarantino movies and garlic.  I am the stuff of unicorn farts and nightmares.

6. I can make asparagus that will change your life and have really big knots in my hair.  I cannot make humans.  For the rundown on that, click here.

7.  The above mentioned is allegedly the theme of this blog.  Mostly, however, it is the ramblings of a mad woman.

8. I have been married seven eight years to Bubba.  Other than working as a computer nerd he mostly falls asleep on my couch, grunts, and grows fur in strange places.

9. I am adopted.  And yes, the depiction of adoptees in horror movies is absolutely accurate.  I'm figuring out a way to crawl out of your computer screen in slo-mo right now.

10.  If you want to, you can totes contact me.  I was nice one time.  I think it was a Tuesday.

2 comments:

  1. Just discovered your blog and love your writing and sense of humour! I'll be checking in regularly for sure!

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  2. "I'm convinced I wasn't assigned a stork, but some sort of disabled pigeon." - omg, I swear I'm laughing so hard I'm almost crying. And picturing my own disabled pigeon eye-balling yours, akin to the one in Bolt, saying "I know dis guy!"

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